


It's Gon

by Ranshiinsitha



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: This is crack but I will not tell you anything just take the risk and read it you coward
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-30 01:28:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13939611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ranshiinsitha/pseuds/Ranshiinsitha
Summary: The Phantom Troupe tries to help Gon find something that he lost.





	It's Gon

“ya dun goofed” Feitan said holding the greenery down.

It was in that moment that Gon knew: he fucked up.

But Gon didn’t care, he never cares, of course, if he cared he wouldn’t be in this situation, but once again, the boy had some kind of fetish for danger.

Hisoka watched from the corner and got a boner, how he wished he was the one pining Gon down. But he had the Tesla boy so he was fine.

“hey lil mama lemme whisper in your ear” Hisoka said to Killua. Killua was disturbed, he shivered, “fucking Gon I’m gonna murder him and his entire family” he thought to himself, he cried on the inside.  
“This is why my family didn’t want me to have friends.” Killua looked around, it was dark, and it looked like a lot of illegal activity took place there very often, because what else could be happening.

“YOU NEVER LET ME FINISH READING MY GOD DAMN BOOKS” someone shouted from somewhere.

Oh shit that person was angry.

Gon didn’t care, maybe they were friendly!

“DANCHOU” Everyone said at the same time.

Killua froze, that man was the leader, and seemed dangerous, and handsome, and dangerous.

And handsome.

God dammit Killua.

Hisoka was jealous because he noticed Killua was looking at Chrollo and he didn’t want to share either of them.

Then Chrollo walked up to Gon.

Hisoka was about to scream. But he didn’t.

Gon looked up at Chrollo and saw his huge eyes. 

“KAWAIIII!!!” He said. 

Feitan smashed Gon’s face on the concrete slab 14 times.

“SHALNARK IS THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO BE A WEABOO IN HERE” Feitan said holding Gon by the hair. Blood ran down Gon’s face and nose and pooled on the concrete beneath, but he didn’t care.

Shalnark overheard his name and came back from the trance he was in, he was playing Love Live on his phone and hadn’t sleep for 18 days on a row.  
He had forgotten how to speak so he started singing and prancing around.

Chrollo seemed disappointed so he knocked him down.

“He gets like that when he doesn’t get enough sleep.” He apologized.

Awkward silence for 2 minutes.

Shalnark was snoring on the floor and Chrollo confiscated his phone, he would need to do so something about Shalnark’s addiction to singing lesbians. He was curious about why would he be so addicted to this game, but it was better than when he was addicted to hentai; oh boi that had been something.

However, Chrollo wanted to know things.

“What is your name?” he asked Killua.

“Ki—“ 

“Ok good enough.” He interrupted. Killua was shocked because his parents taught him to always let people finish talking. But then he felt sad, maybe Chrollo didn’t have a family? The white Pikachu felt sad, sad music played in the background, but nobody knew where it was coming from.

“What about you?” He asked Gon.

Hisoka walked away crying because he was so jealous he couldn’t take it anymore.

“My name is Gon”, Gon said. And everyone went silent.

“How’s that possible?” Chrollo asked seeming shocked, his eyes took up 50% of the space in his face now because of how wide they went from the amazement. Gon wanted to use some Japanese euphemism again but Feitan said Shalnark was the only one allowed to be a weaboo and Gon always abided to the rules because he is a good boi.

Gon didn’t understand why Chrollo was so shocked.

“But don’t you remember it?” He asked, concerned.

“Remember what?” Gon asked with a smile on his face.

“Your name”

“My name is Gon.” Gon said again, and Chrollo seemed disheartened.

“How can such a thing be possible!?” He exclaimed. "I cannot kill someone whose name is…". 

He almost fainted dramatically.

“Okay everyone we’re going on a quest to find it”

He announced to the troupe and everyone (except for Hisoka that was crying in his room looking at pictures of his anime husbands to forget about real people) agreed.  
Ah, Shalnark was knocked out cold on the ground so he couldn’t agree either.

Gon didn’t understand what was going on but he was thankful that they wanted to help him.

“We will help you but you need to do something for us, and since you’re a good boy I know you will.” Chrollo smiled at Gon.

“Anything for such a nice group of people!” Gon said happily, still held by Feitan.

“We are after the person that murdered our dog Uvogin, they use chains and sure hate animals. Do you know them?” 

Gon gasped! “That is Kurapika!” He was shocked that Kurapika murdered a dog.

“Kurapika is our friend, but we didn’t know he killed your dog” Gon frowned, he was sad and disappointed.

“And where can we find him to have a polite and civilized talk with him?” Chrollo asked.

Gon told Chrollo where Kurapika was staying and warned him to not to call him a lady or he would run away crying.

Chrollo was thrilled Gon was so cooperative, Killua thought he was an idiot.

The Troupe left to find Gon’s name and Kurapika.

Hours later they returned.

Killua and Gon were good and didn’t run away because otherwise how could Gon get his name back, right? Right.

Chrollo and his totally not crazy friends came back covered in blood. Gon was worried, Killua was unfazed he didn’t care about blood anymore, his family was insane.

“How did it go!?” Gon exclaimed jumping from where he was sitting.

“I’m afraid we didn’t find your name.” Chrollo said sadly.

“Oh :(“ Gon said, but he wasn’t sad for long.

“Did you talk with our friend Kurapika?”

“Yes.” Chrollo said wiping the blood off his face. 

Gon was happy everyone were friends and could eat at McDonalds together as buddies now.

(Except for Shalnark, he was in a coma)

The end.

**Author's Note:**

> So, say what! I have crippling clinical depression and I should be doing homework and art, but I can't bring myself to do anything so here's my attempt at being "productive", which is a lie of course, I hope you enjoyed it anyways.
> 
> I don't do drugs, I'm naturally this way.
> 
> Don't do drugs kids, drugs are bad.
> 
> Find me on tumblr @ ranvomitsart  
> DA @ Gyokouen
> 
> Look at this hilarious fanart a friend made! https://cranberrytaboo.tumblr.com/post/171782835493
> 
> Let me know if you laughed ♥
> 
> PS- I know people with different english levels will read this, and I don't want anyone missing out the joke this revolves around. It's basically "Gon" is pronnounced the same as "Gone", so when Gon says his name is Gon everyone thinks he's saying his name is gone. Silly I know.


End file.
